Before Nicholas was born (that is, when he was still Peanut), Sarah and I discussed whether we would allow him to watch television as a baby. There are several schools of thought on the question. On one side is the Baby Einstein company, which markets DVDs for infants and toddlers to watch, usually hand puppets and baby toys with a soundtrack of Mozart or Beethoven tunes. The theory is that listening to quality music and watching these "educational" videos will help your child's development (or else!). We know that at a minimum they keep children calm, from having seen them with our friends' children. And, frankly, the videos are mesmerizing. It's hard not to get sucked in. Which leads me to the other side, which includes researchers who have recently argued that these kinds of programs either provide absolutely no benefit, or that they hinder children's language development. Plus, as I said, the programs are mesmerizing. I watch them and zone out. I'm not sure I want Nicholas's growing brain to do that for very long.
But sometimes it's tempting. Now that Nicholas is three months old, he spends quite a bit of time awake. Sometimes too much, as we've detailed at other points. But even when it's fine for him to be up and doing things, it's created quite the dilemma for us. As it turns out, we're just not that entertaining. To be sure, we can make it a little while--half an hour or forty minutes playing with him, showing him toys, singing to/with him, pacing around the apartment. Eventually, though, Nicholas just gets bored. The only thing that will calm him down, it seems, is sitting in front of the television for a few minutes.
We figured this out by accident, when I was pacing with him one evening several weeks ago, and stopped in front of the TV for a few moments to check in on a baseball game. Nicholas immediately stopped crying, and sat enraptured. Walking through Target yesterday afternoon with Nicholas in a stroller, I noticed he was craning his neck to look at the big-screen TVs as we walked past them.
And so we find ourselves in a parenting conundrum. Do we let him watch TV in order to gain some peace and quiet for ourselves (and maybe even time to take care of chores or making dinner)? Or do we stick to our ideals and our prenatal commitment not to let him watch television as a baby, even if it's hard and makes more work for us? I think just from writing this that we'd probably prefer the latter, but that the former will make an appearance every now and again.
The biggest problem that "researchers" and "doctors" have, and the reason they say that it delays speech, is that a lot of parents plop the child in front of the TV and that's it. The key is to continue to interact with and talk with your child, even at three months old. "Nicholas, that is a Yellow Submarine" begins teaching colors and continues him hearing your voice, which is a big component of learning.
ReplyDeleteYou saw Abby yesterday - she's been watching TV since 3 months. At first it was just hockey - but then we discovered Signing Time and incorporated it into our routine, rather than just "happening on" it from time to time. Her signing helped us communicate before she could talk (milk, more, food) and after that we discovered that our deaf neighbor has a daughter who was born in January. If we want to be good neighbors, we decided to learn his language so that we can communicate, so we have kept on going.
Anyway - TV is not the devil-in-electric-form. If anyone gives you grief, have them talk with my two year old, because she can hold a conversation already, just wait until her show is over. :o)
That's a good point. And frankly, if you read very carefully between the lines of the post, you'll notice that we make exceptions for baseball, and when we just need to calm him down so he can reset himself. Also for West Wing.
ReplyDeletePlus football season is coming up. What kind of father would I be if I didn't watch sports with my son? (Once he can hold/throw/catch a ball, we'll do that too!)